Babysitting for the Violently Insane
by I Run With Sporks
Summary: In which Rose becomes the unwilling babysitter of the Bat Brats.


**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**I hate these things as much as you do, so I'll try to make this quick:**

**Before people start complaining "Rose, Tim and Cass are the same age! Jason is older!" THERE **

**IS A REASON. Ravager (Rose) was featured in one of the 'Titans GO!' comics, which had her **

**roughly the same age as the others. Tim/Cass/Jason originally showed up after Dick had grown**

**up and become Nightwing- but I wanted to have them living together so that they could grow up with each other, be siblings, and generally drive each other crazy. And that meant they would have to be a lot younger then Dick, who is still a teen, and somewhat younger then Rose who is a teen but still younger then Dick. So.**

**I do not own the Teen Titans. That would be slavery, which is frowned upon in most societies.**

"Are you sure?" Richard asked his friend doubtfully. "I don't know about this..."

Richard and his friend Joseph were currently sitting on the roof of one of the school buildings, tossing the occasional food item at teachers passing below. For some strange reason, it never occurred to the victims to look up.

'_It'll be fine.' _Joe signed, rolling his eyes. He wasn't deaf, but he had been using sign language since losing his voice at age eleven. No one was entirely sure how this had happened, and he wasn't telling.

"You don't get it. You've never met my siblings, they'll drive anyone crazy. And Jason is essentially violence on legs. Yeah, I don't think-"

'_This is my sister we're talking about. It. Is. Fine. And if she doesn't get out of the house soon, _I'm_ going to go crazy.'_

"About that... does Rose know you signed her up for this? Richard asked, one eyebrow raised. He was having difficulty imagining the violent fifteen year old willingly agreeing to spend time with a bunch of kids.

_'I haven't mentioned it, no.'_

"Oh, good luck breaking _that_ to her."

_'For the last time, things will work out! I'm sure she'll be okay with it.'_

~**TIMELAPSE~**

"Have you lost your MIND?!"

Joseph winced, gingerly poking an ear and mouthing the word 'ouch!'.

"Is there anything inside that stupid blonde head of yours besides music and dead flies?!"

At five feet two inches, Rose Wilson was slightly on the small side for her fifteen years, but what she lacked in stature she made up for in volume. Scowling darkly at her older brother, she blew her bangs

upward with a short puff of air.

Joe took the opportunity to get a word in.

_'I don't see a problem.'_

"You don't see a- Joey, think here! Me, work with small, strange, children! There are so many ways this could go wrong! _Too_ many!"

_'C'mon, have some faith in yourself.'_

Rose gave an unintelligible splutter, staring at him incredulously.

_' 'Sides, they aren't exactly random stranger-kids. They're Dick's brothers.'_ Joe got the feeling this wasn't going to help. He was right.

"Oh, and that makes ALL the difference! Forget it! There is no way I am babysitting a bunch of kids, your friend's brothers or not!"

_'Rose, you owe me.'_

Rose halted in her ranting to glare at him, fists clenched. Joe crossed his arms, unmoved.

_'If I hadn't covered for you, you would have gone to Juvie again-'_

"Could you just let it go?!"

_'The fact that you got a teacher fired? No.'_

"I barely did anything!"

_'You put porn in his desk on an inspection day!'_

"So? I had help! And porn isn't THAT big a deal."

_'No, but I think the marijuana was uncalled for.'_

"Whatever!"

_'Why did you even HAVE marijuana? I _know_ it wasn't yours.'_

"God, stop trying to be all _parental_ at sixteen, it's not working! And it was Jade's, she sells that sort of thing."

_'She what?'_

"If you ask me, they should have fired Yor a long time ago, anyway. The man was a friggin' racist! Do they even interview these people?"

_'Couldn't you have found a way to do it legal- you know what? Forget it. You owe me, I'm asking you to babysit. You're babysitting.'_

Rose gave a yell of frustration and rage, then stormed off in a flurry of long white hair. Joe sighed, already feeling exhausted. How had Dick described his brother? Violence on legs?

Hopefully, the kid was ready to meet his match.

**~ANOTHER TIMELAPSE~**

About an hour or so later, Rose marched up to the Wayne residence, faltering slightly once she reached the ornate front doors.

"Sheesh. I knew Dick's family was rich, but _this_..."

Squaring her shoulders, Rose took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

"DOORBELL!" Someone screeched within.

A loud _bang_ echoed this statement, and then "Well, _I'm_ not getting it!" echoing faintly. Rose gave a slight scowl as the door swung open.

"Er...hi!" She started. "I'm supposed to be looking after...well, you, I think."

The kid at the door, a short, skinny boy with black hair gave a nod. "Rose Wilson?"

"Yep."

"C'mon in."

She entered, following him down an extremely long hallway. The walls were painted a dark gray and decorated with multiple old fashioned looking paintings, all of which Rose found faintly creepy. The silence didn't really help either.

"Sooo," She began, attempting to make conversation. "Your parents still here?"

"If you mean Bruce, then no. He's been out of town for a while."

"So then who-"

"Normally Alfred, the butler. But he needed a vacation really badly. Being stuck with us for the next week and a half would just be cruel."

Seemingly deciding he had said too much, the kid- Rose realized she still didn't know his name- clammed up again, only acknowledging her presence by occasionally looking to see if she was still there.

Gritting her teeth, Rose felt like if somebody didn't say SOMETHING, she was gonna go nuts.

"Tim! Where oreos?"

Reaching the end of the hallway, Rose got one good look at the living room before the owner of the voice she'd just heard crashed into her with a force that nearly knocked her over.

"Oof! Careful, you!"

"You" eyed her carefully, as though sizing her up. Had the girl not been smaller and younger then guide-boy, Rose would have found this more worrying.

"Cass," Guide-boy addressed Miss You. "This is Rose. She's the one watching us tonight. Rose, this is my sister, Cassandra."

"Cassandra" scowled, and kicked her brother in the ankle. Wincing, he added "Generally called Cass."

Cass gave a nod of approval. "Oreos?"

"I think Jason ate them."

Cass's expression of wariness melted into irritation. "Stupid Jason! Oreos _mine_!"

"Oookaaay..." Rose interrupted. "This might be a stupid question, but who's Jason?"

"I'm Jason."

Rose turned to see a kid of about thirteen years sitting on top of a bookshelf and shooting her a distinctly unfriendly look. She narrowed her good eye.

_Hmph. Pretty tall for a kid, looks fast, seems in a bad mood. Should probably be kept away from pointy objects._

Rose's staring match with Jason came to an abrupt end as Cass snatched up a pen and threw it at him. Her aim was surprisingly good. Had Jason not caught the pen, it would have nailed him between the eyes.

"What the #*/$, Cass?! That would have killed me!"

"Thief!"

"The $ *& are you talking-"

"OREOS!"

Jason's look of outrage turned to the incredibly annoying look older siblings like to give younger siblings when they have acquired something the other wanted very badly. "Your name wasn't on them."

"!*#^!"

"Could you two act human for one night?!" The third kid exploded, massaging his forehead. "Non-family person visiting! Can you _please_ not give people another reason to think we're all homicidal psychopaths?!"

"We are," Cass told him, dark eyes quizzical.

"That's not my point! We-"

"Ah, shaddup Tim, nobody wants to hear you talk."

_Oh, so that's his name. Tim._

Jason jumped down from the bookshelf, moody once again.

"She shouldn't even be here. I _definitely_ don't need a babysitter, and I don't think Miss Knife-Happy over here does either."

_Knife-happy?_ Rose glanced at Cass. The girl gave her a side-glance through shoulder-length black hair, then focused on her brothers again. Apparently Rose wasn't worth her trouble.

"I bet _you_ could take care of yourself too, even if you are a wimp. We don't somebody taking care of us!"

"I think we're getting a babysitter more for the neighborhood's safety then ours," Tim said coolly. "Which is mostly your fault."

"WHAT?! Who's side are you-"

"The last time we were left alone, you got bored and set the neighbors' bushes on fire."

"Cass thought it was fun!"

"Was fun!"

And the time before that, you "borrowed" Ms. Quinzel's Harley Davidson and accidentally hit somebody's goat..."

"Goat meat," Cass made a face.

"Y'know, I really feel bad for Ms. Quinzel. She didn't deserve to have her car blown up on top of everything else."

"Ha!" Jason looked triumphant. "That wasn't my fault. That was the Kent kid and your little girlfriend!"

Tim gave a long suffering sigh. "For the last time, Kara isn't my girlfriend! She's my friend who's a girl."

"Friendgirl." Rose suggested.

"Yes, exactly!"

Jason rolled his eyes. "Hmph. I look forward to when I can make fun of you for liking a girl and get a reaction."

"Gah. Who do you think I am, Dick?"

"No, thank God. One's enough!"

Cass gave an annoyed sigh, and flicked a paperclip at Jason. It hit him on the ear.

"Ow! What now, She-beast?!"

"Oreos." She said, holding out a hand.

"There are no oreos. I ate them."

"Buy oreos."

"Forget it."

"You ate oreos. Oreos mine. That make you thief. I want oreos. Hungry. Fix. Fix, fathead, fix NOW. Food, or I stab throat while sleep. Not like thief."

Rose raised a curious brow at the girl's odd manner of speaking, but chose not to ask. Sticking one's nose where it didn't belong was an excellent way to get it bitten off, and she liked her nose attached to her face.

Aaaand, speaking of things getting bitten off...

"Cass? Cassandra? Yeah, please quit biting his fingers, they're turning purple."

Cass growled, then released Jason's hand as Tim pulled her off. Rose quickly grabbed her wrist and pulled her into the kitchen before Jason stopped nursing his sore fingers to kill her.

**~YET ANOTHER F#CKING TIMELAPSE~**

Cassandra eventually settled on a bag of Chips Ahoy found in the kitchen, and announced that Jason would not be allowed to eat any. She then made a point of giving some to everybody BESIDES Jason, just to be annoying. And thus, Jason was in a very bad mood.

"No more!" Cass said, inspecting the inside of the bag. They were all in the living room once again, with Jason sulking behind the couch.

"Hmph!"

Tim looked mildly exasperated. "How old are you again? Five?"

"You shut up. You're like an old man trapped in an eleven year old body!"

Rose squinted at Tim. "You're eleven? Seriously?"

He scowled. "Yes, I'm that old. I'm just-"

"A midget!"

Tim chucked Cass's pen (Which had still been on the floor) at the couch, much to Jason's audible amusement. Apparently this was a sore spot.

Rose rolled her eyes. "You coming out anytime soon?"

"None of your business, nosy!

She twitched slightly, then calmed down, speaking in a conversational tone. "I met a cat named Jason once."

"That's nice," Jason-the-human sent back, his reply dripping with sarcasm.

"It was this vicious little animal, scrawny, violent and always in a bad mood."

"I don't care." Jason was beginning to get annoyed again. Cass and Tim shared a brief glance, wondering where this was going.

"Reminds me of you, actually!"

Cass started laughing. Jason, however, burst out from his hiding spot in a rage. "SHUT UP!"

Rose's expression turned thunderous. "Do _not_ talk to me like that. Not ever. Got it?" She spat. She had had just about enough of this brat. Cass gave a warning hiss as Jason sped past. This was going to end badly.

Rose dodged as Jason tried to punch her. To her surprise, the boy was actually pretty well trained. Anyone else would have been in trouble, even if he was a kid.

Dancing out of the way to avoid a sharp kick, she blocked another punch, then gave a gasp of shock and pain as Jason actually managed to hit her.

Her mind went blank. There was a blur, and then the world went back to normal- except for the fact that she now had Jason pinned down in a way that would snap his arm if he moved too much. He seemed to realize this as he was holding very still.

"Rose, let him go." Tim's voice was firm, carrying a slight warning.

Rose let him up, then half walked half ran out of the room.

She stopped after finding herself in a room she didn't recognize, a staircase leading upstairs being the main feature. She sat down on the bottom step and tried to organize her jumbled thoughts.

The last time something like that had happened had been back when she was living with Slade- only he hadn't been Slade, then. No, that was when he was Dad, the man who'd come for her after Mom died, who looked after her, taught her martial arts and how to use weapons. That was back when she and Dad were a team, going after people like the ones who had hurt Joey. Back when she had been strung out on adrenaline and nameless drugs to keep alert and make you invincible to the point of stabbing out her own eye.

Rose touched the patch covering the empty socket. The Rose who had done that was supposed to be different from the Rose who looked after little kids- but perhaps she wasn't as gone as she would have liked.

"I knew something bad would happen."

"Rose?"

Tim entered the room, not bothering to turn on the light. Squinting slightly to see better, he went and sat down next to her.

"Are you okay?"

"Me? What about your brother? I went psycho on him."

Tim shrugged. "He's fine. A little shocked- but fine. He doesn't lose very often."

"I am...I am so sorry. No, sorry doesn't even BEGIN to cover it. I'm-"

"Rose, _it's okay-"_

"NO IT'S NOT." Tim jerked backwards in alarm. Rose winced, took a deep breath and tried again.

"It's not okay. It is not okay because I attacked a kid I'm supposed to be babysitting, and I could have...killed. Him. And that is...incredibly messed up. And disturbing. And if I had any decency at all, I would stay very far away from you guys and never go near you or any child again- actually I think that's what I'm going to do. That was not okay, so get away from me."

She pulled her knees up to her chest, and stared expectantly at him, waiting for his exit. Tim did not seem as though he planned on leaving. He was giving her a look of extreme patience that he probably reserved for very stupid people.

"Okay. You had your chance. Now can I say something?"

"No."

"You couldn't have actually killed Jason."

"Yes, I could've."

"No, you really couldn't. First of all, I'm not even sure he CAN die- he's come close many times, but nothing's ever actually done it. Second of all, Bruce had all four of us learn how to protect ourselves- so each one of us is perfectly capable of killing someone with our bare hands."

"...I'm sorry, what?"

"It's...we all learned self defense stuff, judo, muay thai, tae kwon do- except Cass already knew most of that stuff when she came to live with us, and...it's complicated. Bottom line, I've seen Jason fight grown men and _win_. The only reason you got him that time was because you're faster then he is. That's it."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Rose let out a sigh somewhere between relief and exhaustion. "Is he pissed?"

"Mm...a little," Tim decided "But not that much. It's mostly shock, I think. It's probably good for him. He likes to scare people off by being violent and jerk-y, and most of the time it works. But you won here, so- I think he kind of respects you now. Not that he'll admit it of course, but still."

"He shouldn't."

"That's _your_ opinion. Most people wouldn't mind." Tim got up and walked towards the exit, turning to her when he reached it. "Are you going to sit here and be miserable, or are you coming?"

"I'm going, I'm going. Hang on." Rose ordered, getting up to follow him. Then she paused, looking speculatively at the staircase.

"You guys don't have any pillows, do you?"

**~LAST TIMELAPSE, I _PROMISE.~_**

"Explain this to me again." Tim looked dubious. Rose nodded, picking up a pillow.

"Okay. Kole taught me this-"

"The crazy chick with the pink hair?" Jason interrupted. Rose frowned and bopped him with her pillow.

The two had managed to reach an unspoken truce after Rose apologized, and were now starting over. It was working out considerably better than either had expected.

"Kole, her name is Kole. But yeah, her. Anyway, it's real simple. You just take a pillow, put it on the hand rail thing, sit on it and slide down! Easy."

All four of them were at the top of the stairs, Jason and Cass listening avidly and Tim sitting at the top of the banister looking worried.

"This doesn't seem safe...I don't know about..."

"Ah, quit whining. It's not that far down, you'll live." Jason crossed his arms, looking impatient. Tim scowled fiercely.

"Easy for you to say! You lived after falling off a small building!"

"Not ask." Cass advised Rose.

"Oh trust me, I won't."

"How come _I'm_ the crash test dummy, anyway? You seem to be immortal, Jason, so how about you-"

"Just go!" Losing patience, Jason gave his brother a shove that sent him zooming downwards. Tim gave a small scream before crashing with a force that made Rose thankful they had thought to put more pillows at the bottom. He didn't move.

"Tim?" Jason called uncertainly. "You still alive?"

"Tim?" Cass repeated. He didn't respond. Cass turned to Rose sounding surprised. "I think Tim dead!"

Rose scrambled down the staircase. "Jesus H. Christ! If I've killed him...Tim, speak to me!" She poked the child's prone body, unsure if she should move him or not. Tim twitched and gave a small groan.

"You're alive! Thank God!"

"Never agaaaain..."

Cass then chose to take her turn, speeding down and then crashing into Tim. Tim gave a yelp of pain before loosing a string of expletives Rose hadn't thought he was capable of.

"Get off me or I'll kill you!"

"What, are you just going to take that? Get him, Cass!"

"Shut your head, Jason!"

"Die, stupid Tim!"

Right at that moment, the doorbell rang.

Everyone froze.

"Oh, shi- er, shoot." Rose managed to correct herself. "If your brother sees this..."

"Go!" Jason hissed, gesturing wildly. "Try and stall him! We'll fix it!"

"One of you has to come with me! I need proof you're still alive, or I've got no chance of getting paid!"

Tim rolled his eyes and shoved Cass at her. "Here. Go."

Rose and Cass made their way down the creepy hallway to the door. Rose opened it, attempting to make her expression as neutral as possible.

"Hey, Dick."

"Hi, Rose." Dick looked first at Cass, then back at Rose. "Any problems while I was gone?"

Rose shrugged. "Meh. Not really. Had something to eat, goofed off for a bit. Everyone's still in one piece."

"That's good." There was a short awkward pause while Dick waited for her to move out of the doorway and she refrained from doing so. Rose debated asking for payment.

"So," Dick broke the silence first. "Where's Tim and Jason?"

"Uh..." She scrabbled for an excuse. "They're... they are..."

"Somewhere," Cass put in helpfully.

"A little more specific, please?" Cass treated her oldest brother to a glassy-eyed stare, which Rose correctly interpreted to mean she was out of ideas.

"Here," Tim poked his head out of the door, smiling pleasantly. Jason nudged past Rose onto the doorstep.

"About _time_ you got back... what were you doing, anyway?"

"Nothing you need to worry about," Dick assured his little brother coolly. Jason laced his fingers behind his head, unfazed. "Assassinating the president? Out with Kori?"

Dick made a funny coughing noise at the second one, going red. Jason started laughing.

"What, really?"

"Good night, you guys," Rose interjected, smirking slightly at the banter. "I'm going home."

"Yeah, alright. Dick, go ahead and pay the old hag, she doesn't have all night."

"Old hag? Watch yourself, Cat Boy."

"WHAT did you call me?" Jason looked outraged.

"Cat Boooooy..." Cass sang, going back inside. Tim grinned. "Nice, it suits you."

"Oh, shut up, Timmy."

Rose settled on a fee with Dick, then headed home, noises from the Wayne house still audible.

"Why are all these pillows behind the couch?"

"No reason!"

**Holy SHCLA-MOLY this was long. I am so sorry. **


End file.
